Honesty

I have, for a very long time, prided myself on being honest. I tell my students they have to be honest with me if they didn't do or didn't understand their assignments because it's the only way I can help them. I tell them they have to be honest with each other if they want to have meaningful relationships, and I tell them they have to be honest with themselves if they ever hope to live their most authentic life.

I am full of shit.

Well, sort of.

See, I completely believe all of this for everyone else. Sometimes I believe it for me, but not always. And I certainly have a hard time telling the people I love most the truth, especially if it's stuff they may not want to hear. I have this deep need to please, to be liked, and it can get in the way of me being me, of living--you guessed it-- my most authentic life.

So, today, I told the truth. A lot. I said a whole lot of things I haven't been saying, I trusted myself and someone I love to be able to take it, whatever the consequences.

I am too old not to practice what I preach, and if I'm telling my students to practice honesty, I'd better be just as brave as I expect them to be.

Cross your fingers that I made the right choice.